I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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