if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize