i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
