i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
