I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
