Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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