i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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