i already hear my dad disowning me
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
