I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
