it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
