Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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