the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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