He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
