remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
