I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Randomize
