Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
