No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
