He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
