how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Drunk is a universal language darling
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
