You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
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