Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize