Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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