I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
