got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
