Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
