planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
