playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
