And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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