I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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