yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
