It's like God shit irony all over that family
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
