I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize