hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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