is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize
