i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
