PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
