I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i barfeds in our rink
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Im just a social blackout drinker.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
