so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
