I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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