Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
