I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
