Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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