it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
are you so shy because you have an std?
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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