Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
