But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
