Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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