HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
