I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize
