names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
