Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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